Remember the Time

I was working for a software training company at the time. Advanced Excel was the class I was supposed to teach at Nomura Securities located at the World Financial Center; just a stone's throw from the World Trade Center. I had taught classes there twice prior and enjoyed going to the marina and taking in the view of the Towers and Lady Liberty. As fate would have it Nomura cancelled the class the day before.  My wife (who was my girlfriend at the time) and I also got into a huge argument that same day so I wasn't looking forward to spending the day stewing in my juices. On the 11th, the argument between my wife and I had carried over to a tense early morning of silence and cold stares. She ended up leaving to work without us saying I Love You or even hugging each other before she had left. One hour after my wife left to work I saw the coverage on the Today show. Similar to everyone at the time, I thought it was an unfortunate accident...until the second plane. I was immediately frantic because my wife's office (we had worked for the same company at the time) was just a few blocks from the Empire State Building. Several attempted phone calls did not go through so my fear increased exponentially. As I tried to frantically get in touch with my wife, reports of the Pentagon being hit came on the news. My parents live in Virginia and my mother and brother worked in the DC metro area. I cried with frustration when I finally received a call from my wife's cousin who assured me that everything would be o.k. Two hours after that I was able to speak to my mother. I never got in touch with my wife but I knew she was fine via my mother in law, who had called me from work. She told me that my wife had called her and asked her to get in touch with me because she could not.

I feel truly blessed. I'm fortunate enough to still have the people I love the most in my life. Because of that event I make sure that I tell my wife I love her as much as I can, especially if one of us is angry with the other. I look back and think of what I would not have now if anything went different that day. I would not have my son who inspires me everyday, my wife would not be my wife, my family could be going through the same heartache that families directly impacted by the attacks are still dealing with. To those families I extend my prayers and solidarity. I extend grace to the people who were met with racism, bigotry, and hatred due to the actions of cowards. It is not acceptable to persecute Muslims, Siks, or anyone from the middle east. The attacks that occurred 8 yrs ago should indicate how hate and persecution of people you know little about is dangerous and leads to tragedy. The gift I received as a child was living abroad. Although I did not appreciate it then, it is indelible now. Living abroad has given me an insight that allows me to learn and accept first and judge second. This is something I will teach my son because it is what my parents taught me and I believe he will be the better for it giving him a better world to live in.

Ellison a.k.a Edmund Starbanks